The other night while sitting in my backyard kiddie pool and having a drink with a close friend, we were discussing Beyonce’s new song “Flawless.”
To be honest, the song itself doesn’t impress me (I’m more of a classic song/lyric kind of gal… ya know, the kind that doesn’t throw out b*tches and GD all the time). However, it did make me look into the woman who speaks during the song: Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie.
As I did my research, I found a connection with her. I ended up watching her TedTalks presentation, which is below. She is an incredible storyteller, who is able to make light of a situation that she clearly cares very much about… as we all should.
As a female, I have a lot to say about this subject, but if you watch and listen to her speech, she says it so perfectly.
She is an amazing person, and I will be delving more into her writings and speeches because she is truly an inspiration. I believe that everyone can benefit from her speech because “gender lessons” can be changed through children.. the children that are growing up now, and the children that are yet to be born.
Feminism isn’t about taking off bras and refusing to shave. Feminism can extend to both sexes. It’s about understanding that gender doesn’t change our worth.
I will finish this out with the part of Adichie’s speech that is included in “Flawless”:
“We teach girls to shrink themselves, to make themselves smaller
We say to girls: “You can have ambition, but not too much
You should aim to be successful, but not too successful
Otherwise, you will threaten the man”
Because I am female, I am expected to aspire to marriage
I am expected to make my life choices
Always keeping in mind that marriage is the most important
Now, marriage can be a source of joy and love and mutual support
But why do we teach girls to aspire to marriage
And we don’t teach boys the same?
We raise girls to see each other as competitors
Not for jobs or for accomplishments, which I think can be a good thing
But for the attention of men
We teach girls that they cannot be sexual beings in the way that boys are
Feminist: a person who believes in the social,
Political, and economic equality of the sexes.”